Listening is the doorway through which understanding walks in

RICHARD: Hey, welcome back to Single and Blooming on GospelSung. My name is Richard, and I’m so excited about today’s conversation. You know, one of the things I hear most from our listeners is this sense of being stuck—like life is happening for everyone else while you’re just waiting. And I think many of us have wrestled with that feeling at some point. Today I’m joined by Sharon, a Christian counselor who has some really profound insights about this journey. Sharon, welcome to the show.

SHARON: Thank you, Richard. I’m glad to be here.

RICHARD: So Sharon, I know you’ve been walking intentionally in your season of singleness, and I’m curious—has it always felt intentional? Or was there a time when you were just as stuck as many of our listeners might feel right now?

SHARON: Oh, absolutely. For years, I was completely stuck. I was functional—going to work, serving at church, showing up at family gatherings—but internally, I was on pause. I had convinced myself that my real life would start when I got married. Everything felt temporary, like I was living in a hotel room instead of a home.

RICHARD: That’s so honest. And I think a lot of people can relate to that. So what changed? Was there a moment or was it gradual?

SHARON: There was definitely a moment. And I should say, I had heard all the sermons about contentment and trusting God’s timing, but none of it had really penetrated my heart. Then one morning, something happened that completely shifted everything for me.

RICHARD: Tell us about that morning.

SHARON: I woke up early, couldn’t sleep, and I was scrolling through social media seeing engagement announcements. I felt that familiar knot in my stomach. Then the Holy Spirit spoke so clearly: “Why are you living like you’re in a waiting room?” That question undid me. I realized I had put my entire life on pause, waiting for a husband to validate my existence. I was professionally active, but spiritually I was sitting in a chair waiting to be called.

RICHARD: Wow. That’s such a powerful image—the waiting room. What did you do with that revelation?

SHARON: I woke up early one morning, couldn’t sleep, and I was scrolling through social media seeing engagement announcements. I felt that familiar knot in my stomach. Then the Holy Spirit spoke so clearly: “Why are you living like you’re in a waiting room?” That question undid me. I realized I had put my entire life on pause, waiting for a husband to validate my existence. I was professionally active, but spiritually I was sitting in a chair waiting to be called.

RICHARD: What did you do with that revelation?

SHARON: I got on my knees right there and repented. Not for being single, but for despising the gift of this season. I had been treating singleness like a disease instead of an assignment. I prayed, “God, if I never marry, will you be enough?” And I stayed there until I could honestly answer yes. That took three hours. I cried, I wrestled, I bargained with God. But when I stood up, something had fundamentally shifted.

RICHARD: That’s powerful. How did that translate into your daily life?

SHARON: Immediately, I made three concrete decisions. First, I bought a journal and started what I call “present-tense dreaming.” Instead of writing “when I get married, I’ll travel,” I wrote “I’m going to the mountains next month” and I booked the trip that week. Second, I stopped avoiding married friends. I had been isolating myself because their lives reminded me of what I didn’t have. I called one of my friends and confessed this, and we cried together. Our friendship deepened in ways it never had. Third, I changed my prayer life entirely.

RICHARD: Tell us about that prayer shift.

SHARON: I had been praying for a husband every single day for years. It consumed my prayer life. I decided to take a six-month fast from that prayer. Not because I didn’t want marriage, but because I needed to know God outside of that desire. For six months, I prayed about everything else: my calling, my character, the nations, my family, wisdom, intimacy with Christ. Those six months became two years.

RICHARD: What happened in those two years?

SHARON: I discovered I had reduced God to a divine matchmaker. When I stopped petitioning Him for a husband, I started encountering Him as Father, Friend, Counselor, Comforter. My Bible reading changed. I stopped reading every passage through the lens of “how does this apply to my love life?” I started reading for transformation. Song of Solomon became about Christ’s love for me, not just a prophetic word about my future spouse.

RICHARD: Give us something practical, Sharon. What does your prayer life look like now?

SHARON: Every morning, I spend the first 20 minutes in silence. Complete silence. This was hard at first because I wanted to immediately start talking to God, making requests. But Psalm 46:10 says “Be still and know that I am God.” I set a timer and I just sit in His presence. Then I read Scripture, but I’ve stopped reading devotionals that tell me what to think. I read the text and I ask the Holy Spirit, “What are you saying to me today?” I journal what I hear. Then I pray through thanksgiving, worship, confession, and intercession for others. My own needs come last, and honestly, by the time I get there, I’ve usually received what I need.

RICHARD: What about the lonely nights? The weddings? The baby showers?

SHARON: I’ll be honest—I still have hard moments. Recently I was at a wedding and felt a wave of grief. But here’s what I’ve learned: I don’t run from those feelings anymore. I went to a quiet corner, and I said, “Holy Spirit, this hurts. I need you right now.” And you know what happened? I felt His presence so tangibly. He reminded me of Isaiah 54:5: “Your Maker is your husband.” Not your future earthly husband, but right now, the Creator of the universe has committed Himself to you. That’s not a consolation prize. That’s the ultimate reality.

RICHARD: Sharon, I want to shift gears for a moment because I think it’s important for our listeners to hear this. When you stopped waiting and started living, what actually bloomed in your life? What changed?

SHARON: Oh Richard, everything changed. First, my character. I had to confront things I had been avoiding—my impatience, my tendency to compare myself to others, my need for external validation. When you’re single and intentional, there’s nowhere to hide from your own growth areas. The Holy Spirit started working on my temperament, my mouth, how I handled disappointment. I became someone I actually respect.

RICHARD: That’s powerful. What about practically—your day-to-day life?

SHARON: Financially, I stopped living like my money wasn’t really mine. I had been in this holding pattern, thinking “I’ll make real financial decisions when I’m married.” I started investing, bought my own place, learned to budget with intention. I have peace now about my finances because I’m stewarding them, not just managing them temporarily.

But here’s what surprised me most—I became genuinely happy. Not the fake “I’m blessed and highly favored” happiness we perform at church. Real joy. I started traveling—small trips at first, then bigger ones. I took that art class I’d been talking about for five years. I deepened friendships because I stopped seeing my friends as fillers until my husband showed up. I hosted dinners, started a small group in my home, became a mentor to younger women. My life became full, not in a distracted way, but in a rich, purposeful way.

RICHARD: So you’re saying singleness stopped being something you were enduring and became something you were actually stewarding?

SHARON: Exactly. I realized God doesn’t give us seasons to endure—He gives us seasons to steward. And when I started stewarding my singleness, it bloomed. My capacity for intimacy with God expanded. My ministry impact grew because I had availability. My emotional health improved because I was addressing root issues instead of waiting for marriage to fix them. I became whole, not in the sense that I don’t have needs or desires, but whole in the sense that I’m complete in Christ right now, today.

RICHARD: One more thing before we close—what do you say to the woman listening who thinks this sounds nice but impossible?

SHARON: Start small. Tomorrow morning, before you check your phone, sit in silence for five minutes. Just five. Ask the Holy Spirit to meet you there. Don’t bring your wish list. Just come. He will show up. I promise you that. And get brutally honest in your journal. Write the thing you’re afraid to say out loud: “God, I’m angry I’m still single.” “I feel like you’ve forgotten me.” He can handle your honesty. That honesty is where breakthrough begins.

RICHARD: Sharon, thank you. This is just the beginning of our conversation. Next episode, we’re diving into purpose.

SHARON: Thank you, Richard. To everyone listening: you are not waiting. You are living. Right now.

RICHARD: What a conversation. If today’s episode resonated with you, I’d love to hear from you. And remember, you’re not alone on this journey. Until next time, keep blooming. This is Richard, and you’ve been listening to Single and Blooming on GospelSung.